Situation: Parents communicate grace to their children when they stay in control during misbehavior.

Parent Talk Tip: Diane Moore says that when kids get the wrong messages form parents it’s usually during a period of bad behavior, while the times that unconditional love and grace are shown may not be the times that the child most needs them.

When a child receives unconditional love, “even when they’ve done their worst,” Moore says they experience grace. “When you’re in control of yourself, your face reflects positive regard for this child and respect.”

She says that strong parenting is still needed at those times, explaining, “You’re still gonna hold the line, but you’re not rattled.”

Diane Moore is a certified family life counselor and parent mentor with a private practice in Vancouver. Parent Talk is her radio talk show heard in Portland, Vancouver and Boise. Today’s tip comes from a conversation between Moore and one of the show’s callers. It has been edited for time.

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